I feel very conflicted. I got a bit mad with Ellie because she wouldn't let me soothe her, so I thought, fine, let her cry. Put her into bed and walked away. I don't want her to need to be held to get to sleep, and I don't want her to think that she can just cry and we'll always pick her up. I want her to feel safe, loved and confident in her parents. I don't want her to feel abandoned, and sad. So it's a bit of a conflict.

It took about 15 minutes for her to get to sleep. Which isn't bad. But I still feel guilty-- was it necessary? Or would she have cuddled into me and slept if I wasn't so tense (my shoulder is hurting). I don't know.